Eye of The Storm

Disclaimer:  This is a copy of a letter sent to N.O.A.A. last week.  It was in production before Irene ever came near the coast, so it was not written to belittle the people who have endured her wrath or experienced loss as a result.  Now, that being said, I believe those who would get most offended are still without power, so…let’s just get this underway before they come back online… 

Dear NOAA,

In light of the recent increase in tropical storm activity, I have been perusing your website.  I saw a link for the Hurricane naming list and was fascinated by its history.  I did notice, however, that in the ‘H’ category, the name ‘Haven’ was not used.  I would like to take a few minutes of your time to make a case for why I believe this is a name worthy of entering your rotation.

I think you would agree with me that two of the most notable traits of a hurricane is that they are destructive and they are most often named for women.  Let me just say that I totally get the logic at work there.  It just so happens that I have a 10-month old daughter named Haven, and when I think of raw destructive power, this little girl is what pops to mind.

Since she learned to crawl, there’s been no end to the path of devastation she leaves in her wake.  She sweeps through the house, howling with glee at the mayhem she will cause.  Clearing a coffee table, emptying a cabinet, or yanking over a trashcan is done in the blink of an eye.  Other times, she moves silently, like the eye of the storm, waiting to get a hold of the really dangerous things.  She’s already destroyed her mama’s expensive candle stand (a hurricane candle stand), and it makes me extremely nervous at how she eyes the grandfather clock.

Caught in the act

“But what about water,” you may find yourself asking.  Yes, we have that covered too.  Haven is amazing in the water.  Bath time is an event that requires at least two or three towels to clean up.  No liquid is safe from this little one’s ability to gather and fling it with wild abandon.  The dog bowl is her favorite target.  She’ll silently crawl into the kitchen, stand up at the dog’s feeder, and splash water all over the floor and walls until the nearest adult extricates her from her fun.

Right now, she may be containable, but I estimate that she’s just building in intensity.  It’s for these reasons that I believe Haven deserves a place in your naming rotation.  It’s interesting to note that the word ‘haven’ denotes a place of refuge or rest.  I think the inherent irony is something the Hurricane Naming Convention has been missing for much too long.

Thank you for your consideration.  I await your reply.

Sincerely,

Michael Thomas

NOAA was kind enough to reply.  Here's their answer.