An End

Author's Note:  As a result of a recent health screening, it's been brought to my attention that some life changes are in order.  This is a copy of a letter I sent to Dr. Pepper, in an attempt to make a clean break from a long-standing habit.  Hope you enjoy.

Dear Dr. Pepper,

I’m writing you this letter because I think its best we not meet in person anymore.  I've been doing a lot of thinking about where my life is headed and who will take this journey with me.  I want you to know that I’ve not reached this decision lightly.  I've talked to a lot of people who have helped me understand that it’s time for you and me to see others.

It tears me up inside to think of the years we’ve spent together and how it feels like I’m throwing that all away.  At 20 fluid ounces a workday, for the last five years, we’ve had more than 195 gallons of quality time together.  And that’s not even taking into account the ten years previous where we had a more casual relationship.

I need you to understand that it’s nothing wrong that you’ve done.  This is my fault.  Maybe if I had a little more self-control, we could still be close friends, but as it is, I need space and time to just settle on who I can become.

I know that without you, I’ll be less of a person.  I’m hoping by at least 10 pounds.  I’ll not easily forget the sharp, bubbly flavor of the time we spent just chillin’ at my desk.  Because of you, the number 23 will always hold a special place in my heart.  Not only is it a beautiful prime number, but it reminds me of the mysterious 23 flavors that you contain.

Please remember that I’m not doing this out of malice.  I’ll still proudly wear my Dr. Pepper hat when I work out at the gym, and throw my Dr. Pepper football with the boys.  I’m not ashamed of you in any way, and I hope you can find it in your heart one day to forgive me for ending our relationship so suddenly.

I wish you the best,

Michael